1. Mohan: Why did the girl put a packet of sugar under her pillow.
ravi: To have sweet dreams.
2. Son: I had a tough day at the Office
Mom: At the office (surprisingly)
Son: Ya ,at the principle's office
3. Q:WHICH IS THE LONGEST ROPE IN THE WORLD?
A:EUROPE
4. Once upon atime there was a man.
He says I have two daughters both are girls.
5. TEACHER-what did your father present your sister on her birthday?
STUDENT-SHE WANTED TO SEE THE WHOLE WORLD,SO HE GAVE HER AN ATLAS !
6. Teacher :What did Mahatma Gandhi give us?
Pinki:Ma'am he gave us a holiday for 2nd october.
7. Pinky:Which dog has no tail
Rinky:I dont know. You tell me
Pinky:A hot dog
8. How do you prevent a Summer cold?
Catch it in the Winter!
9. Teacher(to a boy):Give me an example of barren land.
Boy:My father's head.
10. Ramu-What are you doing standing here in the hot sun?
Shamu-I am drying my sweat.
11. Teacher:- Ramu,can you tell me the difference between morning and evening?
Ramu:In the morning our teachers scold us and in the evening our parents do that.
12. Shubham:What kind of ants like maths?
Parikshit:I give up
Shubham:An-account-ant
13. Once a mad man told to another mad man --There is a war between India & Bharat.
Another mad man -but why should we worry?We live in Hindustan.
14. Three men under an umbrella. But they did'nt get wet ,how?
Because it was n't raining!
15. Teacher-Which was the first thing to land on moon? Kid-The wheels of the Space Ship
16. Son: Mummy Mummy I Am Going for Swimming ? Mummy: No son It Is To Cold Son: Mummy I Am wearing A Sweater
17.When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
18.I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
19.Finish the start
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already.
20.Trouble sleeping
The woman seated herself in the psychiatrists office. "What seems to be the problem?" the doctor asked.
"Well, I, uh," she stammered. "I think I, uh, might be a nymphomaniac."
"I see," he said. "I can help you, but I must advise you that my fee is $80 an hour."
"That's not bad," she replied. "How much for all night?"
21.Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
22.The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
23."I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
24.The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
25.Two Things to make a sardar BUSY:-1)write P.T.O on the both sides of a paper and give it to him. (2)Take him to a circle room and tell him to sit on a corner.